she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
