girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Is it because I queefed?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize