i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
