sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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