idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
