i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
