Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
