We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
