I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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