What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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