she smelled like a LAN party
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
