I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
