i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Randomize
