Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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