Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
