i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
