so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
