Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
