ugly people sure do ruin things
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
