White coat. Heels.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
