I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
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