You can't motorboat a personality
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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