i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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