I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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