Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Randomize
