You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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