your room smells of hookers.
And success
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
