He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize