I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Randomize
