i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
In America we eat man semen.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
it glows. i had to have it.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
