Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
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