I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
