Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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