Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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