i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
