When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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