She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
