problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
