are you still at the devil's house?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
