I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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