shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
