'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize