mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
