Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
