why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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