i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
