you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Still dying that you shit outside
My penis needs a shock collar
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize
