im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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