You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
