You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
